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零距离美语会话[家庭]Lesson 5:You cant change a childs behavior by using force

 

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Five    You can’t changechild’s behavior by using force!
能用武力改变小孩行为!

   Introduction 
In America, children are well protected by law.  If parents beat or kick their kidsthe police know that,bruisesthe kids can causeparentsbe putjail.  Or sometimeschildren will be separated from being with their parentsputa social service, ifparents maltreat them.  Sometimesparents are punished, even when they have not harmedchild, butauthorities believeparents have done wrong.
在美国,孩子受到法律严格保护。如果父母亲打伤或踢伤小孩,警察知道后,小孩身伤痕就可以使父母亲被关进监狱。如果父母亲虐待他们小孩话,或者时候小孩能再和父母亲生活在起,而被送往社会服务机构。时候即使父母亲没伤害小孩,但官方认为话,父母亲还得受到惩罚。

2   Sample Sentences
.  Have you ever asked your relatives, friends, neighbors,colleagues at work about what kindchildcare do they use?
    你问过你亲戚朋友、邻居以及同事,他们怎么管教小孩
2. Doeskindergarten plan activities every day?
幼儿园每天都计划活动吗?
3. Arechildren you see absorbedwhat they are doing?
你看见小孩全神贯注在做他们事?
4. In general,more adults there are,more likely itthat your child will receive individual attentionadequate supervision at all times.
般来说,那儿成年人越多,你小孩就更可能时常被人照看到,被管理得更周全。
5. I know you wanthavefeelingsecurity.
我知道你想种安全感。
6. Regarding our son’s behavior,suggest that he be treated with patience, affection,respect.
关于我们儿子行为,我建议你耐心照看他、爱他并且尊重他。
7. DougBeth often threaten very quicklypunish their son if he behaves differently from their expectations. 
  道格和贝斯经常很快就威胁惩罚他们儿子,如果他听他们话。
8.think you already realize that punishment does not always produce good children,many times harshness produces maladjusted children.
  我想你已经意识到惩罚并培养出好孩子,很多时候严厉导致小孩失调。
9.assure you thatwayteach our boybegood personforadults around himseegoodhim.
  我敢保证教育我们儿子做好人方法就在他身边大人看到他好方面。
0. Children learnbe happy by learning howthink.
   小孩子要想学会做快乐人就要学会怎么思考。

3  Conversations
. A Chinese wifetalkingher American husband about their young son’s bad behaviorsthe phone.
A: don’t want yoube worried, but our son has some bad habits now.  He says painful words everyday.
B:  What words?  Can you tell me?
A:  He says “kick mommy, beat mommy, don’t want mommy” very quickly ifdo something that he doesn’t like.  You know, ifwashface or changeclothes, things like that.
B:  Honey,don’t know whattell you.  Of course Tonya young child.  But do not underestimateabilitylearnreason.
A:  Yes, but sometimes hejust not reasonable. 
B: suggest you treat him with patience, affection2,respect. If he needsdo something, like gobed, or be washed, etc., please "guide or help" himgetdone, but lead him with gentleness.
A:  It’s easysay, butwill try.
B:  Motivate3 Tonycooperate4 by rewarding5good behavior.  Do not emphasize punishmentbad moods, etc.  Do not threaten6 him with punishment if he resists7actions you desire.
A: know my parents sometimes threatenpunish him.  But this doesn’t work; instead he picks up another bad habit.
 【译文】  
——我想让你担心,但我们儿子现在些坏习惯。他每天都说些伤人话。
——什么话?你能告诉我吗?
——如果我做什么事他喜欢,他很快就说“踢妈妈、打妈妈,要妈妈”。你知道,像跟他洗脸或者换衣服之类事。
——亲爱,我知道该怎么跟你说。当然托尼还小孩子。但要小看他学习、讲道理能力。
——啊,但时候他就讲理。
——我建议你多点耐心,爱他,尊重他。如果他需要床睡觉、或者被清洗之类,请指引或者帮助他完成,但定要温柔。
——说来很容易,但我还会尽量去做。
——要和托尼合作好,你就要奖励他给他积极性。要因为坏脾气就强调要惩罚他。要因为他按照你做就威胁要惩罚他。
——我知道我父母时候就威胁要惩罚他。但管用,反而他又学多坏习惯。

2.   Talking about punishmentyoung kids.
Chinese:  Paul, you were alsoparentyoung kids before. So, can you tell me what you did when your kids didn’t behave very well?
American: know Markyour only child.  You may dodifferently from whatdid.  Sometimeswould tap8 their hands when they made troubles.
Chinese: do it, too.  You know, sometimes when we eat, my child would pulldish towards himgrab9withhandseat.  And ifwere something he doesn’t like, he would spitoutthrowinto other dishes.  He doesvery often. really get mad. can’t help spank0 him sometimes.
American:  And what does your husband do?
Chinese:  My husbandan American.  He criticizes me whendo that.  He says thatcan’t changechild’s behavior by using force.  Helearning whatam doing now. 
American:  But spoilingchildnot goingdo him good either! You’ve gothave patience with himteach him.  It’s not easy,know.  It’s hard.
Chinese:  Yeah.  I’m still learning howcontrolbehaviormy temper.   My childalmost two years old,I’ve learnt“distraction” 2 technique when he criessomething.

 

Additional Information:
 Actually parents shouldn’t punish their children too harshly.  It dependswhat kindthingchild has done.  Besides,child might break something by accident or he didn’t mean it.  We should always givechildchanceseeown mistakes. 
实际父母亲应该过分惩罚他们孩子。要看他们做错什么事。而且小孩可能无意中摔坏某东西,存心。我们应该永远给孩子机会让他看清自己错误。

【译文】
——鲍尔,你以前也孩子父亲。那么,你能告诉我你小孩捣乱时你怎么做吗?
——我知道马克你唯小孩。你可能和我当初做样。当他们惹祸时,时候我会轻拍他们手。
——我也这么做。你知道,时候我们吃饭,我小孩会把菜拖到他面前,用手抓着来吃。而且如果喜欢吃,他就会吐出来,扔到其他菜里。他经常这样做。我很气愤。时候我忍住打他屁股。
——那你丈夫怎么办?
——我丈夫美国人。他批评我那样做。他说我能用武力改变小孩行为。他会学我现在所做
——但溺爱小孩也会对他什么帮助!你得耐心教他。我知道这并容易。很难。
——啊。我还在学习怎么控制他行为和我脾气。我小孩快两岁,当他哭着要某样东西时,我学会分散他注意力。

4  WordsExpressions
. underestimate  低估; 对...估计足 
2. affection  情爱, 钟爱
3. motivate  给...动机; 刺激
4. cooperate  合作, 协作 
5. reward  奖赏, 报偿
6. threaten  威胁, 恐吓
7. resist  抵抗, 反抗
8. tap 轻拍
9. grab 抓取, 霸占
0. spank  (用手掌)打...屁股
. spoil 宠坏, 溺爱
2. distraction  分心, 注意力分散


 

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