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零距离美语会话[家庭]Lesson 5:You cant change a childs behavior by using force


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Five    You can’t changechild’s behavior by using force!

In America, children are well protected by law.  If parents beat or kick their kidsthe police know that,bruisesthe kids can causeparentsbe putjail.  Or sometimeschildren will be separated from being with their parentsputa social service, ifparents maltreat them.  Sometimesparents are punished, even when they have not harmedchild, butauthorities believeparents have done wrong.

2   Sample Sentences
.  Have you ever asked your relatives, friends, neighbors,colleagues at work about what kindchildcare do they use?
2. Doeskindergarten plan activities every day?
3. Arechildren you see absorbedwhat they are doing?
4. In general,more adults there are,more likely itthat your child will receive individual attentionadequate supervision at all times.
5. I know you wanthavefeelingsecurity.
6. Regarding our son’s behavior,suggest that he be treated with patience, affection,respect.
7. DougBeth often threaten very quicklypunish their son if he behaves differently from their expectations. 
8.think you already realize that punishment does not always produce good children,many times harshness produces maladjusted children.
9.assure you thatwayteach our boybegood personforadults around himseegoodhim.
0. Children learnbe happy by learning howthink.

3  Conversations
. A Chinese wifetalkingher American husband about their young son’s bad behaviorsthe phone.
A: don’t want yoube worried, but our son has some bad habits now.  He says painful words everyday.
B:  What words?  Can you tell me?
A:  He says “kick mommy, beat mommy, don’t want mommy” very quickly ifdo something that he doesn’t like.  You know, ifwashface or changeclothes, things like that.
B:  Honey,don’t know whattell you.  Of course Tonya young child.  But do not underestimateabilitylearnreason.
A:  Yes, but sometimes hejust not reasonable. 
B: suggest you treat him with patience, affection2,respect. If he needsdo something, like gobed, or be washed, etc., please "guide or help" himgetdone, but lead him with gentleness.
A:  It’s easysay, butwill try.
B:  Motivate3 Tonycooperate4 by rewarding5good behavior.  Do not emphasize punishmentbad moods, etc.  Do not threaten6 him with punishment if he resists7actions you desire.
A: know my parents sometimes threatenpunish him.  But this doesn’t work; instead he picks up another bad habit.

2.   Talking about punishmentyoung kids.
Chinese:  Paul, you were alsoparentyoung kids before. So, can you tell me what you did when your kids didn’t behave very well?
American: know Markyour only child.  You may dodifferently from whatdid.  Sometimeswould tap8 their hands when they made troubles.
Chinese: do it, too.  You know, sometimes when we eat, my child would pulldish towards himgrab9withhandseat.  And ifwere something he doesn’t like, he would spitoutthrowinto other dishes.  He doesvery often. really get mad. can’t help spank0 him sometimes.
American:  And what does your husband do?
Chinese:  My husbandan American.  He criticizes me whendo that.  He says thatcan’t changechild’s behavior by using force.  Helearning whatam doing now. 
American:  But spoilingchildnot goingdo him good either! You’ve gothave patience with himteach him.  It’s not easy,know.  It’s hard.
Chinese:  Yeah.  I’m still learning howcontrolbehaviormy temper.   My childalmost two years old,I’ve learnt“distraction” 2 technique when he criessomething.


Additional Information:
 Actually parents shouldn’t punish their children too harshly.  It dependswhat kindthingchild has done.  Besides,child might break something by accident or he didn’t mean it.  We should always givechildchanceseeown mistakes. 


4  WordsExpressions
. underestimate  低估; 对...估计足 
2. affection  情爱, 钟爱
3. motivate  给...动机; 刺激
4. cooperate  合作, 协作 
5. reward  奖赏, 报偿
6. threaten  威胁, 恐吓
7. resist  抵抗, 反抗
8. tap 轻拍
9. grab 抓取, 霸占
0. spank  (用手掌)打...屁股
. spoil 宠坏, 溺爱
2. distraction  分心, 注意力分散




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